The Dummy at the King's Assesment Feast

I'm getting the hang of this S.C.A. business. Having felt rather useless with no skills  these past months--no sword fighting, no archery--and struggling to fashion some garb so I am presentable at events, I finally found my niche.

I am a bona fide kitchen wench, scullery maid...call me what you please...I'll answer to it.

The "kitchen" has never scared me. I'm a good baker, a better stew maker, and a great quiche faker (I buy mine). So, it seemed natural that I could lend the only talent I had helping out in the kitchen under the direction of two excellent and practiced chefs for our barony's King's Assessment.

I made bread bowls, peeled and sliced turnips, peeled and grated carrots, mixed the ingredients for mini-cheesecake cups, and washed dishes, and washed dishes, and did I say, washed dishes? How boring you archers, and swords-people must think. But there is one thing I can guarantee...I do believe I got as much exercise in the kitchen that day, as any of you on the competition fields.

Does anyone have a recipe for relieving dishpan hands?

KIRTLES, GIRDLES, AND TURTLES.

What have KIRTLES, GIRDLES, AND TURTLES have in common?
The words (according to Miriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary) all came into use prior to the 12th century.

Kirtle -def.1- a tunic or coat worn by men in the Middle Ages.
            def.2- a long gown or dress worn by a woman. ( So why is it women get 2nd. billing?)

Girdle-def.1-something that encircles or confines as (a) an article of dress encircling the body usu. at the waist (b) a woman's close-fitting undergarment often boned and usu. elasticized that extends from the waist to below the hips.

Turtle-No definition needed. We all know what a turtle is.